Second in Command One Shots
by Lena7623
Summary: Second in Command One Shots. Small scenes that take place in my 'Second in Command' series. If you don't read the three stories Second in Command, Revenge, & Redemption , you will NOT understand these. Mostly funny one-shots.
1. Chapter 1

(Author's Note: Ah, the first of the promised one-shots for 'Second in Command' series! As I said, the first is going to be a bit from the wedding party. I'll label where all of these fit into the canon of my stories, so there shouldn't be any confusion. I've gotten some lovely ideas from readers that I plan to use, and credit as long as the idea wasn't sent anonymously. If anyone comes up with any other ideas, let me know!)

**Everything Fits into Place**

(Fits: Post epilogue of 'Redemption'.)

The wedding had been short and wonderful, and the party was fit to be nothing but rambunctious. Phoenix had known that it would be even when it was barely in the planning stages. It was a party that Tony Stark was a part of, how could it be anything but an alcohol soaked fest?

After the 'traditional' things were done (cutting of the cake and whatnot), they were all free to mingle with one another. They had went inside of Tony's Malibu home now, as sand in a cake is never fun. JARVIS was being a wonderful dear and playing along with the festivities, performing admirably as a DJ at the moment. Phoenix herself wasn't too fond of modern music, but he was playing a good mix and modern and older music, so she didn't mind too much. It seemed as if everyone else was enjoying themselves, after all.

However, it was when she went out for a bit of air that she spotted someone from a distance. Thankfully, she had already changed from her dress to a pair of cut off jeans and a green tank (a tribute to her husband), so it was nothing for her to catch up with the far away figure.

"I'm hoping that you at least brought a gift, Coulson," she remarked as she stood beside him.

"Actually, I did. At least of sorts," he remarked, pulling what appeared to be a communications device from his pocket. "Fury wanted me to give you this eventually. It's for when you're away and you're needed for Avenger problems."

She actually laughed. Of course the agent would give her something 'work related' at her own wedding. "When I get to take my honeymoon, I'm going to hide this thing somewhere. You know that, right?"

"If it's bad enough, we can find you anyway," Coulson reminded her.

"I'm not shocked at all," she admitted, turning and looking out at the ocean. "What are you doing out here? Why aren't you at the party, anyway?"

"I still haven't told them," Coulson admitted. "It's hard to explain away 'hey, I'm not dead like you thought,'" he explained to her.

"Well, while they're all a little drunk and happy is a good time," she said, grabbing him and throwing him over her shoulder. He struggled, exclaiming that he'd rather do it on his own time table, but she wasn't having any of it. Maybe it was the champagne that she'd had herself before coming out, but she was wanting to give these people back something that she knew that they wanted.

As she brought in the still mildly struggling agent inside of Tony's home, she called out, "I found a certain someone hanging around and watching the party!" She deposited Coulson into a nearby chair.

It was like one of those movies where someone scratches a needle across a record. Everyone stopped, and Phoenix realized that MAYBE this was a little rash. Things were completely silent for a moment, and then everything exploded into noise, several people talking at once.

"How is he alive?" Tony shouted. "Did Fury lie to us?"

"Did you bring him back to life?" Steve asked, staring spellbound at Coulson.

Those were the only two sets of questions that Phoenix had been able to pick out of the crowd of voices. Most of the people were converging on Coulson, happy to see him alive. Phoenix herself was just glad that she hadn't actually killed the man. All of them seemed happy that he was alive, and more than one person hugged the agent. Even though he seemed to show discomfort at the intimacy (which amused Phoenix greatly), she could see that he was happier that the others knew that he was alive as well.

"How long have you known that he was alive?" Loki asked, his hands slipping around her waist from behind.

"A few months," she told him. "He's actually the one who's been assigned as our tail. I couldn't help but be amused at Fury's pick."

"How long until you think Tony does something horrid to Fury for deceiving all of them?" Loki asked her.

"I give it a week, tops," she admitted with a giggle.

"Plotting, you two?" A deep, booming voice says from behind them. They both turn around, looking straight at Odin. He looks almost...out of place in the light suit that he was wearing. Phoenix was sure that he would look more at home in armor and carrying a sword.

"Actually, wondering if Tony Stark will be plotting and how long it will take," Phoenix said lightly to him.

"It seems that Midgard is full of mischievous people," Odin remarked with something akin to a smile. He looked like a man who smiled rarely, or maybe simply hadn't had too much to smile about for a long time.

"It's part of what makes this place interesting," Loki remarked, letting go of her and heading over to his mother, who was watching the scene from across the room. This left Odin and Phoenix standing together.

They stood in silence for a moment, before Odin finally broke it. "I thought I was doing the right thing...sending you away, and yet I almost played into Fate's hands by doing just that."

"Fate's a bitch, isn't she?" Phoenix remarked with a slightly dark grin. "Then again, if you hadn't of sent me here, Loki and I may not have ended up together, and now I cannot imagine my life without him." Her smile turned soft. "Humans have a phrase, hindsight is 20/20. It means that we can only see what would have been perfect to do after we have acted. It's better to live with our mistakes and simply move on." She finally turned and looked at him. "Was I **really** sweated out of someone's armpit? That **really** bothers me."

Odin let out a hearty laugh. "Goodness, no. Bards can come up with _such_ creative tales, can't they?" He smiled at her. "They thought you were a male, after all."

"One of these days, I hope they get one tale right," Phoenix said, looking back over at her friends as they continued to overwhelm poor Coulson. At least now things were finally in place as they should be.


	2. Chapter 2

Por Una Cabeza

(Takes place between chapter 7 and the epilogue of 'Revenge.')

Loki and Phoenix had spent only a night or two in a hotel, as she wanted to go back toward where she had first brought Loki back from Asgard, Argentina. It was the closest thing that Phoenix had to a home, actually. Unlike her last trek to Argentina, this time Loki was actually able to teleport them and Socks, waiting for a moment that Phoenix wasn't feeling violently ill.

She understood that she was supposed to feel morning sickness since she was pregnant, but this was ridiculous. She couldn't keep anything down. She wondered how she was supposed to nourish a child if everything that even smelled like food made her want to throw up her insides. She was certain that she wasn't going survive being pregnant, that it was going to kill her and the baby was going to eat her inside out.

Loki insisted that she was just being dramatic.

It had taken nearly a month, but the symptoms had finally subsided. She now seemed to want to eat everything that she could get her hands on, though. She found she had a liking for cold things, ice cream and popsicles and the like. Loki had to force her to pick other food groups. He also made more than one crude joke about having other cold things that she could have if she so wanted. She thought about turning his hair pink but decided against it. It would look wrong and she wasn't sure if she could turn it back.

"Phoenix, you have to stop feeding the cat whatever you're eating," Loki said to her once day when he walked in on her feeding Socks part of her strawberry popsicle. It was one of those that actually had bits of fruit in them.

"I don't feed him anything with chocolate in it," she insisted, breaking off another bit of it and feeding it to the cat with her fingers. "I don't see why I can't feed him some of what I'm having, though."

"Because I bought those for you," he replied. "I don't mind getting you whatever you are craving, but I'd rather you not feet part of it to Socks."

"I can feed part of it to you if you're feeling neglected," she purred to him, grabbing him by the wrist and pulling him down onto her sofa with him. Thankfully, Socks had jumped out of the way and didn't end up being sat on. She then crawled into his lap and drew the popsicle over his lips, giggling.

"Playful tonight, aren't we?" he asked. He sucked the popsicle into his mouth, biting off a piece of it that had a large chunk of fruit in it. "Actually, I did have an idea for what to do tonight if you are up for it."

She took the popsicle back and popped it into her own mouth, tilting her head at him and nodding. She was quite curious to know what he was thinking at the moment.

"I was actually wondering if you would be interested in going out dancing tonight?" he suggested to her.

She thought on it for a second before nodding. "Might as well do it now before I get too large to move around properly." She looked down at the ratty jeans and shirt that she was wearing. "I'll need to change, though." She was just glad that everything still fit her right now, or this would get a lot more complicated.

She changed into a short red dress, smiling at Loki as she came out of the bedroom. Unlike her, he could just magic himself into meticulously tailored black suit. "Tell me, do you change into clothes that you've already purchased, or can you just create everything that you have?" she asked him. "It would be rather convenient to never have to buy clothing again."

"Sorry, it only works with things that I've already bought," Loki explained. "I'm not sure I want to let you out of this place in something so revealing," he admitted to her.

She smirked at him, walking up to him in her heels. "Think of it this way," she started. "You're the one who gets to bring me home and take it off me later," she purred to him. "No one else gets to see what's under it but you."

"I _suppose_ that is satisfactory," he said after thinking on it for a moment. He pulled her closer, snaking his arm around her waist. "Now we just have to actually make it _out_ of here to go dancing."

Standing up a little more on her toes, she nuzzled against his neck, dragging her teeth lightly across his pulse point. "We can always go dancing another night," she teased. She'd really like to go dancing. She'd never seen him dancing but figured that he was good at it. He had rhythm in _other_ ways, after all.

He pulled away from her slightly and scooped her up, cradling her in his arms. "No no...I promised you dancing. We can always have that sort of fun later," he told her. She felt the slightly dizzying sensation of teleporting come over her, and soon they were outside of what appeared to be a bar of some sort. As he set her back down on the ground, she could hear the voices coming out, and, going by the Spanish she could here, she figured that they were still in Argentina.

'Por Una Cabeza' was playing over the speakers in the tiny bar, and she giggled as Loki pulled her into a tango pose. She hadn't done the tango since the 1950's (the last time she lived in Argentina, actually), but it seemed like she was going to be doing it tonight.

She kicked her leg behind her and then he pulled her back to him in a tight embrace, leading her around the dance floor. He was _good_. As he dipped her, she smiled up at him. "Where did you learn to tango?" she asked him. She had assumed that he would know ballroom dances like a waltz, but she just couldn't imagine anyone doing the tango in Asgard.

"I've visited this realm far more recently than any others on Asgard have," Loki explained as he spun her around. "I've seen plenty of others dance this dance before when visiting here. It's not that hard to pick up on. When did you learn it?"

She smiled down at him as he lifted her up in the air. "When I last lived in Argentina in the 1950's," she told him. "I happen to love living in this country so much I've done it more than once."

He laughed and, when the song ended, they walked back to their table. Both of their hairstyles were now mussed, Loki's hair hanging more in his face than normal and the tight bun that Phoenix had tucked her hair into spilling down into soft curls. They danced several more times that night, just cutting loose in a way that she hadn't done in a long time (without hurting anyone, anyway).


	3. Chapter 3

Adventures of Astra and Tony

(Takes place right before the as of yet untitled sequel to 'Redemption.' Astra will be two years old in it, so she's walking and talking, although she doesn't talk very well, obviously.)

Bruce and Tony were eating a late breakfast/early lunch (they had been in the lab since six in the morning and it was now eleven) when there was a faint shimmer in the air and a popping noise, signalling the coming appearing of Loki and likely Phoenix. It wouldn't be Phoenix alone, as, no matter how much she practiced, she couldn't seem to get a hang of teleportation (the last time she had tried on her own, she had accidentally appeared in Tony's workshop naked, which had NOT been her intent, thank you), so she just used a door and knocked like a normal person.

Sure enough, Loki and Phoenix appeared before them, although they weren't alone. Loki was carrying a bag and Astra, and Phoenix was carrying...was that a cat?

"Are you really going to be one of _those_ cat ladies, Phoenix? I know you're old as dirt, but you still look WAY too young to take your cat everywhere," Tony said to her over his coffee mug.

"I can't take him everywhere," she retorted, narrowing her eyes at him not unlike a cat. "That's why you're going to watch him, and Astra for a few days."

"Wait, what?" Tony sputtered, choking on the sip of coffee that he had just taken, finally managing to swallow it down. "No...I don't watch kids. Banner, tell her I don't watch kids." He looked to Bruce for moral support.

"As funny as the idea sounds, it's likely not a good idea," Bruce told them. "I'm not sure that Tony can keep houseplants alive, much less a kid and a cat."

"Thankfully my child has a hardier constitution than a Midgardian _plant,_" Loki snapped, handing the large bag of presumably Astra's things to Tony. Actually, dumping it on his lap is more like it. "Although if you harm one hair on her head, I'll cut off your foot and shove it down your throat."

"The same goes for Socks," Phoenix said, dropping a similar bag, likely full of cat stuff, on the floor before handing Bruce the cat in question. Bruce stared at it like it had three heads while Socks seemed content to spin in a circle before curling up in his lap and going to sleep. "This trip is...last minute, so it's not like we could ask for this in advance. Besides, if you have trouble, ask Rogers. He likes children."

"Then have HIM watch her! I have stuff to do!" Tony demanded, pushing the bag off his lap just in time to be handed Astra, who seemed to have been taught to call Tony 'puppy,' by what she was shouting as she looked at him.

"Such is the demanding life of a royal pet," Phoenix said with a sigh. "It'll just be for a few days. Besides, she's a child, not a bomb. Stop looking so afraid of her."

Both Loki and Phoenix bent down to coo at Astra for a few moments, telling her that they loved her and that they'd be back soon before disappearing again.

"Seriously, what the hell do we do now?" Tony asked, staring bewildered at the child in his lap. Really, he had no business in dealing with children. His home was anything but child proof!

"No clue," Bruce said, then grinning. "Is she really calling you 'puppy'?"

"Shut the hell up."

OoOoOoOo

Tony had placed an immediate call to Pepper, who rushed over right away. After looking through the bags, she insisted that Loki and Phoenix had left them with everything that they would need, and no, he was not allowed to give the baby bourbon if she was teething, no matter what his nanny had done when he was young and BOY did that explain a lot about him. When Steve returned from the gym, Tony had all but handed him the child and ran away. Steve was good with kids. Tony was afraid of them.

Of course, the child of two gods wouldn't let something as simple as a locked door keep her away from who she wanted to be around, and that was apparently Tony. While her mother seemed to have serious issues with teleportation, her daughter seemed to have no such hampering, going by the fact that she appeared on Tony's work desk while he was in the middle of working on blueprints for a new project.

"Jesus Christ!" Tony screamed, tumbling off his stool. He had been in such deep concentration that the girl had scared the bejeezus out of him.

Astra giggled, and, as he looked up from the floor, he could see that the girl had appeared with the cat as well. "Hi puppy!" she said, waving at him from the desk.

"OK, first off, I'm Tony, kiddo," he said, pulling himself up off the floor and sitting back down on his stool. "You really can't call me 'puppy,' at least not in front of the others. I'm a person, not a dog."

"Puppy Tony!" Astra squealed, reaching out and petting him on the head.

Tony grumbled. "I think that's actually worse," he said to her. "You must take a lot more after your father, because your mother sucks at teleportation, although I didn't hate the view from the last experiment," he admitted to her.

"JARVIS, where is Steve right now?" Tony asked.

"He's looking for Astra around the kitchen, sir," JARVIS replied. "Shall I turn on the intercom?"

"Please do," Tony said. "Hey, Steve? I've got a really young, raven haired girl in my lap, and I didn't bring her in here. She one of your dates?"

Steve's frantic voice filtered through the intercom. "Tony? Oh thank GOD you have her. I thought I lost her for sure. How did she get in there?"

"Apparently, she can teleport like her dad," Tony explained. "Her and the cat are in here. You wanna come get them? This isn't exactly the safest environments for a toddler and her familiar or pet or whatever the hell this cat is supposed to be."

"Actually, I think she wants to be around you, Tony," Steve told him. "She's been asking for you all day. Well, she's been asking for her puppy and Bruce explained that she apparently calls you puppy."

Tony groaned as he heard a slight laugh coming from Steve. "I'm not going to get ANY work done until they get back, am I?" he asked, more to himself, but Steve decided to answer just the same.

"I kind of doubt it," Steve replied. "It's actually her dinner time, so you need to come out and feed her."

"Damnit," Tony muttered, standing up. "Come on then, kiddo," he said. As soon as he held his hands out to her, she pounced on him, wrapping her arms around his neck. "Well, you're certainly an affectionate kid, aren't you?" She just giggled in response.

OoOoOoOo

"So, explain to me again how this happened?" Pepper asked.

"It seems that Astra has the same 'ice powers' as her father, Ms. Potts," JARVIS responded from above.

"I think that's obvious to everyone," Tony said.

"Tony, you really shouldn't be doing much of anything right now, much less being sarcastic," Bruce said as he looked the billionaire over.

"Why is Tony half covered in a block of ice?" Pepper shouted. "No one's explained that to me yet!"

She was actually having to shout over the two hairdryers that were running at the moment. Bruce and Steve were trying to get Tony out of the block of ice as fast as they could. The top half of him that was free was already shivering like crazy.

"I was feeding her ice cream and she sneezed, and suddenly I'm covered up to my chest in ice!" Tony explained in a huff, his teeth chattering. "Apparently, she doesn't have the same control as Loki does yet."

"I sorry I covered the puppy in ice," Astra said, pouting slightly from her highchair.

"It's not your fault, kiddo," Tony told her reassuringly. "Your dad needs to teach you to control that, though. I'm not sure how many more accidents like this my body can handle."

OoOoOoOo

It took what felt like forever to get Tony out of the ice, and it took even longer for him to feel anything resembling warm. Steve tried to get him to go to the hospital, but Tony insisted that Bruce could look him over and it would be just fine.

After Astra was put to bed, Tony collapsed in his own bed, ready to pass out and go to sleep. He didn't normally go to sleep before midnight, but today had been a trying day and all he wanted to do was sleep.

He had only been sleeping an hour or so when he felt someone tugging on his blanket. Looking down, bleary eyed, he saw that it was Astra, the cat standing at her feet. "Shouldn't you be in bed, kid?"

"Bad dream," she said to him. She was chewing on her thumbnail in a way he had seen her mother do when she was nervous or scared, which actually had only happened once, when she had those dreams about Thanos.

Rubbing his eyes, he then reached down for Astra, sitting her down on the bed in front of him. Right now he was just glad that he had passed out with clothing tonight. "What kind of bad dream? Normal bad or 'something's about to happen' bad?" he asked her.

She shrugged. "Momma says to listen to all my dreams," she told him. "Any of them could mean something."

"Very true," he said to her with a nod. "Then again, it's not like anyone who sees the future ever sees anything good." He ran his fingers through his hair, absently noting that he needed a haircut. It was getting long enough to almost hang in his eyes when it wasn't slicked back. "Tell me about it."

"Witchy woman going after Daddy," Astra told him. "She kept saying that he owed her something."

"What is it with your parents and pissing people off?" Tony asked. "I don't have a way to contact them, because that would be simple and your parents likely didn't think about it, but we'll tell them when they get back, OK?" He thought of something. "This doesn't happen like, tomorrow, does it?" She shook her head. "OK, good. Alright, let's get you back to bed then."

She crawled back up the bed, wrapping his blankets around her tiny little body. "Sleep here tonight," she insisted, and it seemed like the cat agreed, as it jumped on the bed as well.

Tony realized that he should get up and put her to bed, but he was too damn tired to care. "If you're a blanket hog, I'm gonna be mad," he said, flopping back down in the bed.

OoOoOoOo

"This scene would be adorable if I wasn't worried about the state of those sheets." Steve's voice cracked through the sleepy daze that had been Tony's morning. "Please tell me they've been changed since your last night of carousing."

"My sheets get changed every day, thank you," Tony grumbled, grabbing his pillow and hurling it in Steve's general direction, not even looking up as it missed him by a mile. "What the hell do you think I have robots for?"

"What's she doing in here, anyway?" Steve asked, walking over to Astra's side of the bed. When he nudged the little girl, she burrowed deeper into the blanket. "Seems like she's likes the morning as much as you do," he said with a grin.

"She had a bad dream last night and made her way in here," Tony said. If he was really going to be up this early, he was going to need some damn coffee and a donut or two. "I think it might be one of those prophetic things. She wouldn't go back to her own bed."

"Loki and Phoenix didn't leave a way to contact them, did they?" Steve asked. When he tried to rouse the child again, Socks poked his head out of the bundle of covers and yowled at him in a warning tone, causing Steve to back away. "I really think that cat hates me. It plots against me."

"Nah, but I get the feeling that they can see if anything bad happens," Tony said, laughing when the cat told Steve to basically back off. "It's a cat. It can't 'plot against you.'"

"Who knows what that thing really is," Steve said. "Astra talks to it, you know. She talks to it like she talks to you."

"Kitty thinks you smell like hair gel," Astra muttered sleepily from under her blanket.

Tony laughed until he started snorting. "Well, it's not like the cat's wrong."


	4. Chapter 4

Misery 

(We're going in the way back machine here, folks. This particular chapter is set post epilogue of 'Second in Command' and the first chapter of 'Revenge.')

After her seventeenth failed attempt at bringing Loki back from Asgard (she managed to summon a bag of Florida oranges and she didn't have a CLUE as to why it was that), she knew what she needed was a night out. She had been staring at the same walls for what she was sure was several weeks straight, and it was starting to drive her mad. Even with the new cat that she had, she couldn't exactly truly TALK to it. Well, she could, but Socks lacked the ability to talk back. She had gotten used to some form of social contact with Loki, and now she desperately needed it.

There was a bar in a local village near her home from which she had been buying local wine. She figured that it was as good a place as any to go to tonight. She forced herself to get dressed in a pair of jeans and a long sleeved green shirt (something to make her think of Loki), walking the short distance to the village and bar.

When she walked inside, the bartender/owner smiled at her. "Ah, my best customer!" he called to her in Spanish. "Are you out of wine already? You drink that stuff like water! I like that you buy it, but it can't be good for you to drink so much. I want to keep you alive so you can buy more, you know."

She shook her head, sitting down at the bar in front of him. "Tonight I felt the need for company, so I decided to drink here instead," she said back to him in perfect Spanish. She had spoken the language on and off for several hundred years. She was quite familiar with it. "Just pour me something good. I don't care what it is."

"You're such a sad woman," the bartender commented, pouring her a glass of wine. It was something expensive, by the smell of it. It wasn't as if she didn't have the money for it. She downed half of it in one drink. "Who are you missing?"

She arched an eyebrow at him. "Am I that see through?" she asked him. When he nodded, she continued. She wasn't sure why she was feeling the need to talk so much. She could only assume it was desperate loneliness. "My...what do I call him? Boyfriend sounds so trivial." She had been drinking before she came here. Her tongue was already quite loosened. "A man I fell completely and utterly for in the span of a few days is now in jail, and I have no clue what to do with myself now that he's not with me."

"Ah, you fell for a bad man," the bartender said with a nod.

"He's no worse than me," she said to him with a brief grin, face going somber again as she kept drinking. When her glass was empty, she pushed it to the bartender, wanting it refilled. "I think calling our relationship a 'whirlwind' is an understatement. I never wanted to fall for anyone, mainly because I thought emotions were worthless, but he was...so much like me and it felt like he completely understood me that how could I _not_?"

"_Mi belleza_, you are too young to say that emotions are worthless," he said to her, refilling her drink. "Even if this man is in jail, he did you a lot of good by showing you that love is good and worth having."

"I'm older than I look," she said to him quickly, taking another sip of the wine. "And is it good? He's not here now, and it's killing me to be so far away from him. He gave me something to believe in, which I never had before. He so quickly became a driving force in my life that, without him, I have nothing. I am nothing."

She dropped her head against bar, hair spilling out onto it, some of it getting soaked with spilled wine and beer. She felt the bartender stroke her on the head and, while she didn't normally like to be touched, right now she was drunk enough not to care and she at least understood that he was trying to be comforting and, in her misery, she did appreciate it. "It is better to know these feelings of love and be separated than to have never known them at all, I promise, _mi belleza_," he said to her, and she made herself sit up. "How long will he be put away?"

"Not long, if I have any say about it," she told him, grabbing her glass and draining it again.

"Then pull yourself together! You will have him back before you know it!" the bartender said to her with a wide smile.

She nodded, reaching into her baggy jeans and pulling out money, dropping it on the counter. Despite herself, she really did feel better talking to him. She might even try the spell tonight. If she got more oranges, though, she was going to start pelting them at villagers.

Her hand briefly fingered the gun she had hidden on her person before reaching for the money. She had said far too much to this man, and she really shouldn't let him get away...but she liked him, and, more importantly, she liked his wine. She hoped that letting him live wouldn't bite her in the ass.

With a smile and a nod, she staggered out of the bar, heading back to her home. She hoped that drunkenness and magic didn't mix too badly.

OoOoOoOo

The bartender's son came out from one of the backrooms of the bar, carrying another box of wine to put out for sale. "Who were you talking to, papa?" he asked, setting the box down on the floor.

"A lady criminal," the bartender responded. "She's never actually told me her name. I think she's going to break her boyfriend out of jail soon."

"Which jail?" the son asked. Their bar served plenty of criminals, either local ones or ones passing through or in hiding like the lady, so it wasn't anything out of the ordinary for them.

"Not sure. I think an American one," the bartender said. "I think she's American. I cannot quite place her accent, but I've heard her speak like an American to herself."

"That should be interesting," the son said with a shrug, starting to stock the wine on nearby racks.

OoOoOoOo

As Phoenix slowly staggered home, she only wished that she had taken a bottle of wine for the road. She had more at home, but she wished that she'd had something to drink along the way. Not too far from her home, she sat down on the dirt road, feeling a little too wobbly to walk at the moment.

"I think your magic needs a little more spice."

Phoenix nearly jumped out of her skin, pulling her gun out from her hidden pocket in her jeans, turning to her left to aim it at what appeared to be an old woman sitting beside her. She didn't trust that face, though. There had been nothing and no one near her before. "Who are you?" she asked in Spanish.

"English is fine, fire creature," the woman said to her, not even blinking at the gun pulled on her. "Someone as sad as you shouldn't be without the one you care so much about."

"Fine, English," Phoenix said. "You want to tell me who you are?"

"Just someone who wants to see young love reunited," the old woman purred to her, and, despite herself, Phoenix repocketed the gun. "You're not very good with magic. Not yet, anyway. You're going to need a little extra ingredient if you want it to work."

"Have you been spying on me?" Phoenix snarled. "What's your game, woman?"

"I told you already," the old woman said with a roll of her eyes. "Now stop being so suspicious. Take help where you can get it."

"Fine!" Phoenix yelled, lying back onto the road. "What ingredient do I need, old woman?"

She felt the woman lift up her wrist, holding it up in the air. "Blood is full of life, fire creature. Like can power your magic, make it stronger. Use it and you will be reunited."

When she felt her hand drop, Phoenix sat back up, but there was no one there around her. "I have had way too much to drink," she grumbled to herself, pushing herself back up off the ground.

When she got home, despite thinking that she had pretty much hallucinated the last chat she had on the road, she went to the books that Loki had sent her. She had thought that she had combed through them completely, but she had missed some things. One was that blood _could_ power magic and make it stronger.

She personally wondered if this might be a trap from on high in Asgard, but she was too desperate to care.


	5. Chapter 5

Friday the 13th 

(Takes place during Chapter Five during the few months before Phoenix is kidnapped, during the lull.)

When Phoenix and Loki realized it was Friday the 13th, she explained the significance to him and suggested that it was one of those days that he should claim as his own holiday. It was supposed to be a day of bad luck (and worse horror movies, if what was on TV was any indication). She supposed that the two of them could work together and cause a good string of bad luck for their 'buddies' up in the high tower.

Phoenix personally couldn't remember when Friday the 13th had started to become significant as a day of bad luck, but she figured that it was time to roll with it. The morning started at the Stark Tower with Tony being informed by JARVIS that all the corks had slipped in his wine cellar and most of the wine had spoiled. Tony immediately wondered if something was up, because all of the corks slipping at once seemed like something that was impossible. Still, he bitched and cursed and complained to anyone who would listen (and that was no one after five minutes) about how much money that he had to spend to replace most of it, and some of it was irreplaceable. Ass.

Later, when Clint was trying to practice his archery, every single one of his arrows split down the middle before he could fire them off. Considering that Tony and Bruce had put these together, he pretty much thought that was impossible, but he was staring at a pile of broken arrows just the same, so apparently it was. Gathering them up, he headed down to the lab that he knew the two scientists were working in. "Hey guys, hate to be the bearer of bad news, but all my arrows broke," he said to them as he walked up, dropping the shards of arrows on the work table that they had been using to look over blueprints.

"That's impossible," Bruce said, turning his attention toward the arrows. "There wasn't anything wrong with them when we put them together. Did you do something wrong?"

"What do you mean, did I do something wrong? Nothing different than normal!" Clint snapped. "They just all split when I pulled them back on the bow. It makes no damn sense!"

"What a fucked up day," Tony grumbled. "We'll put you together some more, man. Just...go and do whatever it is you do to make yourself relax," he said quickly, waving the archer away as he looked over the broken arrows. "What a messed up day."

"Definitely. I broke both pairs of my glasses this morning, too," Bruce said, and Tony did realize that the man was missing his normally perched on his nose specs. "I dropped the first pair and then stepped on the second ones. Friday the 13th strikes, I guess."

Before Tony could comment on that, Steve came stomping down into the lab. "Alright, who took it?" he asked, looking around at the three men standing in the lab.

"K, Cap? Before we can figure out who took what, we gotta know what the 'what' is," Tony pointed out to him, arching an eyebrow as he looked over the obviously pissed soldier.

"My shield! You know what! Which one of you funny people took it? I can't find it anywhere!" Steve snapped.

Tony held up his hands in the air before things exploding into a fully blown argument. "OK, guys? Does anyone else think that this is all *really* too convenient to be real?" he asked, looking around at them. "We've had shit luck all day, on Friday the 13th," he said, making air quotes with his fingers around the date. "Anyone else thinking what I'm thinking?"

It seemed to hit them all at once. "LOKI!" they all screamed.

"You rang, gentlemen?" The god appeared in one of the corners of the room, holding up Steve's shield in one of his hands. "This really is a nice piece of work. I was thinking of keeping it for myself. I'd have to have it repainted, of course."

"Get your damn hands off my shield or so help me God..." To get Steve to swear at all was a bit of a feat, so Tony was already trying to not laugh, even though this was NOT the right situation to be laughing in.

"Seriously? Friday the 13th? You gonna be any more cliché, Loki?" Bruce asked him.

"No, the most clichéd would have been April Fool's Day," a female voice rang out, Phoenix, taking her more normal entrances into rooms by coming in through the lab door. "I figured that this was a little more unexpected." She looked at Loki. "Do give the poor solider his shield before he explodes. As funny as it is to watch his face turn red, I think Fury would frown on us giving his super soldier a heart attack, even if he would survive it."

Loki sighed and set the shield down on a nearby work table. "My dear captain, you really are too tense for your own good. Have you thought about yoga? I hear it can be quite relaxing." Steve didn't say anything, just running toward Loki and pouncing, only to hit a wall when the man disappeared, reappearing beside his wife.

Before anyone could say anything, though, there was a roar that came from the kitchen area. "WHO DARED EAT THE LAST POPTART!" Thor screamed at the top of his lungs, and there was a loud boom coming from the area, likely him breaking something.

"You stole all the pop tarts?" Clint asked them.

"No, I ate them," Phoenix said, grinning. "I have a growing child inside of me. Feel free to tell Thor that, though." Loki grabbed her arm, and they were both gone, off somewhere else and likely laughing their asses off.

"Why do we work with them again?" Clint asked everyone, wanting to hide as he heard Thor's thundering footsteps heading toward the lab.

"Because if they are not working with us, they're usually trying to kill us," Tony said, looking for an exit.

"Eating all of Thor's pop tarts doesn't count as trying to get us killed?" Bruce asked, watching as Steve collected his shield.

"Good point. We'll bring it up to Fury at the next meeting," Tony said, pulling up a screen and typing something in. "I have a bomb shelter we can get to from here. We should probably leave before Thor breaks through the door." Without a word from anyone, they all took off in the direction Tony indicated.


	6. Chapter 6

Socks the Cat Strikes Again!

(Author's Note: I'm SO happy to be getting suggestions from people! Thank you both vsama and Amy for dropping ideas to me! Some will likely be featured in this chapter, and others will likely feature in later! Everything I've received so far has been wonderful, though!)

(Actually takes place the day after Tony and Astra's Adventure, on the second day that Loki and Phoenix are out. Eventually a one-shot will show up showing what they are doing!)

"So, your parents really didn't leave any sort of way to get in contact with them?"

It had taken nearly an hour to get both Tony and Astra out of the bed, and that was only after a visiting Natasha had snuck in at one point and took pictures. Once Steve had finally dragged the both of them out of bed and brought them out to the kitchen, Tony had gotten her to explain her dream to him. She hadn't dreamt too much, other than her father fighting someone who sounded to be pretty much on par with him magically. The idea of someone else out there being all magically inclined was pretty damn terrifying to Tony.

Astra shook her head at Steve's question. "Told you so," Tony said smugly over his cup of coffee. He hadn't really been interested in any sort of food this morning, but Steve had cooked breakfast for Astra, who seemed really to be enjoying the pancakes in particular. "Seriously, I got this feeling that if anything bad happens, Loki and Phoenix will be able to get here in a flash and kill us all or help out or something."

"That's not reassuring," Steve said to him. "Actually, that's kind of terrifying. Seriously, neither of them even has a cell phone or something?"

"Yeah, they both do, and I tried them both earlier, but it went straight to voicemail," Tony explained. "For all we know, they're on a different planet or plane of existence or something like that. Even if they're just on Asgard, that's like, probably a shitload of roaming charges or something, if they get signal at all." Now he was already thinking of creating some sort of cell phone that would get signal everywhere, even on Asgard. He'd have to put that off until he didn't have Astra here anymore. He couldn't work with a kid in the house, especially one that could teleport around.

Steve just shook his head. After breakfast was done, Tony convinced Steve to take Astra for a little while, begging her to be good for him while he did some work with Bruce down in his lab floor. She promised that she would *try,* which just made him laugh. This kid was turning out to be kind of a sweetheart and yet every bit as mischievous as both her parents. She was just missing the adopted and abandoned issues that her mother and father had in spades. As weird as they were, he could at least tell that Loki and Phoenix utterly adored Astra and she didn't lack for love. He just hoped that she could avoid all of the angst that her parents and most of the other adults around her had gone through in their lives.

Tony helped out Bruce for over an hour, working with him on a serum that he hoped would one day be able to be used on the Hulk when he had a rage out that wasn't needed or necessary at the time. Those tended to cause collateral damage that SHIELD didn't like having to clean up after.

That one blissful hour of work was interrupted by JARVIS, though.

"Sir, I believe that you are needed in the living area by Mr. Rogers." Tony wasn't sure when he had programmed that dry British wit into his AI system, but it was there and he couldn't stop the grin from forming on his lips even as he sighed and looked toward the intercom.

"What? Steve can't handle a little babysitting duty? I thought that Cap was supposed to be good with kids," Tony remarked, mainly wanting to be left alone to get some work done, especially since it was something for Bruce and that made it extra important.

Before JARVIS could come up with a retort, there was a faint shimmer in the air, along with a popping noise, and Astra appeared beside his legs, ever present cat in tow. Far less startled by it this time around, he simply grinned down at the kid and reached down, lifting her up and setting her on the work station. "Why do I have the feeling that you might be living up to your father's title as 'God of Mischief' right now?" he asked her.

"Sir, Mr. Rogers is currently tied up and covered in Ms. Romanoff's make up in an effort to play what I am to understand is called 'dress up,'" JARVIS's voice rang out, and there was a moment of silence before Tony and Bruce both burst into laughter.

"Do I even want to know how you managed to tie up Captain America?" Bruce asked, pulling off his glasses and wiping at his eyes.

Astra looked at Bruce with an entirely too innocent grin. "Kitty did it," she said to him, giggling.

"You heard her Bruce," Tony said, picking the girl up so that he could go off and untie Steve (although he would be getting many pictures first) and hoisting her up. "Kitty totally did it."

OoOoOoOo

"The cat did it!" Steve yelled, squirming as Bruce undid the eight thousand knots that were holding his arms behind his back. "I swear on all that is holy that cat is magical in some way."

Tony, meanwhile, was sitting on the floor with Astra, rolling with laughter as he looked Steve over. "I gotta say, man, Natasha's red lipstick is definitely not going with your skin tone," he managed to eek out before collapsing into another fit of giggles. "I mean, I appeciate her sticking with the color palate of your uniform, but only low class hookers wear blue eye shadow."

"Tony! We have a magical cat in the tower and you're more concerned about the makeup Astra put on me while I was tied up!" Steve snapped at him. "Can't you just cut through the knots?" he asked Bruce, straining in the chair that he was tied to so that he could turn around and see him.

"Why are you so insistent on blaming this cat when we have the child of a magical wizard hanging around?" Tony asked him.

"Because the cat was the only one in the room when the ropes came out of nowhere and tied me to the chair!" Steve flailed and jerked against the ropes, but that didn't do him any good other than causing the ropes to cut into his skin a bit. "She was off getting the makeup, I think."

"Even if the cat is magical in some way, I'm pretty sure it's harmless," Bruce commented. "And I've tried cutting into these ropes twice. I broke the knife. These aren't any of our ropes. I'm doing good to slowly undo these knots on my own."

"If you ask Kitty nicely, he might undo them," Astra told them.

"Untie me you overgrown hairball!" Steve yelled, earning a growl from the cat.

"No wonder our mystical cat friend hates you, Steve," Tony told him with a snort. Tony picked the cat up, lifting him up to his eye level. "Socks, would you please untie our dear Captain here before he has an aneurysm?" Tony seriously thought that this was play acting of some sort for Astra. That she blamed all of her misdeeds on her 'friend' so that she wouldn't have to take blame for them. What kid didn't do that when they were young?

What he wasn't expecting was for the cat to squirm out of his hands and, with a very *human* sigh, walk over to the chair that Steve was tied up in, stand up on his hind legs, and tug on one part of the ropes with his mouth, causing all of them to slip off of Steve and fall into a perfectly coiled up pile. When Socks was done, he walked back over to Tony, giving him a look that he was certain that asked 'Better?' before wandering off, sitting down by Astra and curling into a ball.

"That might honestly be one of the weirder things I've ever seen, and I've seen Bruce turn into a giant green rage monster," Tony admitted, his jaw dropping while he stared at the cat. "And don't charge the cat like I can tell you want to do, Steve." Tony looked over at the captain, who was rubbing his wrists as he stood up from the chair. "Go wash off your war paint, Stephanie!"

Steve shot a warning glare at the cat, but stomped off. "He really needs to make peace with the cat before it finds a way to leave him naked in the middle of Times Square," Tony said, idly reaching over and stroking Sock's fur.

Bruce's eyes flickered over to Socks. "Don't get any ideas."

The eyes of Socks seemed to promise nothing.

OoOoOoOo

The rest of the day had managed to pass mostly without incident, even though Steve had avoided Socks as much as he possibly could. He looked somewhere between wanting to turn the cat into sausage and wanting to run away from it in fear. When Natasha dropped by again later, she had been a little miffed that some of her makeup had been used, but the pictures that Tony had taken on his phone seemed to more than make up for it. She had then simply promised to give the girl better make up tips when she was old enough to wear the stuff.

Eventually, it was Astra's bedtime, and, tonight, she had insisted on just coming to Tony's room and sleeping in there. He had tried to put up minimal fuss, but his heart hadn't been in it. One flutter of those baby blues and he was putty in her hands.

He had sat up, watching over her as she slept for a while, curling up with the blanket wrapped around her little body, nestled up in the crook of one of his arms. She really did look like the picture of innocence when she was asleep. She was hilariously mischievous when she was awake, though.

"You really should look into having children of your own one day, Tony."

He managed to not jump at the voice, but only because he didn't want to wake the kid. He turned his head, looking at the ever so slightly see-through form of Phoenix leaning against his wall. She waved at the slight look of concern on his face. "I'm practicing astral projection. I'm not good enough at it yet to show a solid image, obviously."

"Good, because for a second, I was worried you were the Ghost of Christmas Present," Tony said with a sigh of relief. "By the way, did you know you have a magic cat? He tied up Steve earlier and let Astra put make up on him."

Phoenix burst into a fit of giggles that made her look...achingly young, even though he knew that she was ancient and he was pretty sure she didn't actually age. "First off, I'm...not entirely sure I can die," she admitted to him, relaxing a little more in her stance. "And...I had suspicions about Socks. He's too smart for his own good." She cast her eyes toward the cat, who acknowledged her with a sleepy look before laying his head back down. "But, I figured that I should check in on how you're doing with my daughter."

"Other than the fact I think she takes after the two of you in causing trouble, we're doing great," Tony said with a grin. "You didn't warn us that she could teleport, either. She's apparently better at this magic stuff than you are."

She grinned, sitting down on the floor. "Well, Loki didn't teach her that." She cast another look toward Socks, who didn't acknowledge her this time. "I think my child might have a magical teacher of sorts." She turned her attention back toward Astra, watching her as she breathed under the blanket. "She likes you, you know."

"Shows she's got good taste," Tony said to her with a smirk. "Did you have to teach her to call me puppy?"

"Well, when you give me puppy dog eyes like that, how could I *not* teach her to call you that?" she asked him with a soft laugh.

"Oh, she had ones of those...dream things," Tony said. "You know, prophetic stuff that you had when you were pregnant with her."

"Those were her showing me what was to come," she told him, her face growing more serious. "What did she dream?"

He explained what little that Astra had told him. It seemed like she had woken from the dream quickly and hadn't gotten to see too much of what was going on. "Another magic user?" Phoenix said, tilting her head and frowning. "That's all we need." She stood up from the ground, walking over to Astra's side of the bed and ghosting her hand over where the child lay. "Maybe Loki knows who she is. I'll ask him shortly."

"When will you guys be back, anyway?" Tony asked her, watching her as she moved, her body flickering slightly like an old projected movie. "Hell, where did you guys go?"

"Nice choice of words there," she said, an odd smirk crossing her face. "I've been getting to meet my stepchildren." She stretched her arms over her head, her shirt climbing up to reveal a sliver of skin. "Thor even is getting reacquainted with his nieces and nephews. It's been...an interesting experience, to say the least."

"I'm not even going to ask," Tony said, waving at her and cupping his hand over his face to cover up a yawn. "You're obviously somewhere that doesn't get phone reception. I've been calling you guys all damn day."

"We should be back at some point tomorrow. Especially with this...new news, this isn't exactly the time for extended vacations." Phoenix looked over his bed with a flicker of disdain. "Have you changed the sheets since the last concubine visited here?"

"God, why does everyone think I sleep in filthy sheets?" he asked with a roll of his eyes. "They're changed every day, and I haven't had anyone here in over a month anyway."

"Ooh, a dry spell. How terrible for you," she said to him with a smirk. "What about Pepper? Didn't you date once?"

"A long time ago, very briefly. Didn't work out." The one he regretted, but he didn't want to dwell.

"You'll find someone someday," she said to him. "You're too good with Astra to not eventually become a father yourself."

He shuddered. "God, I probably am somewhere out there and don't even know it," he said, tiredly running his hand through his hair. "Is that genuine concern I detect in your voice? Ha! You care about me!"

"In the same way socialites care for their purse dogs," she said dismissively, too quickly for it quite to be true. "Don't read too much into it."

"Yeah yeah," Tony said, lying back on the bed. "Look, if you're going to be weird and watch me sleep, that's fine, but I'm crashing here."

"I think that I will pass on that visually stimulating experience," she said to him. "We'll be back tomorrow, though. Probably need to call one of those meeting things. Make sure that Astra's vision doesn't get out of hand." With a wave to him, she disappeared.

Tony rolled over, putting an arm around the small bundle of child next to him and dozing off.

OoOoOoOo

Phoenix's eyes opened, taking in her surroundings again. That was actually the first time she successfully performed an astral projection outside of her own home, and it had been exhausting. She had no idea how Loki did this nonsense.

"So, is everything on fire, or has Stark actually proved himself to be a competent child caregiver?" Loki asked, resting a hand on his wife's shoulder. Right now, they were back on Asgard, having performed several visits to his numerous children. Thor had tagged along, and he had convinced them to drop back in on Loki and Thor's parents to make sure that everything was fine with them as well.

Phoenix rolled her head back at him and smiled. "Everything is mostly as it should be," she said to him. "Astra and Socks are apparently holy terrors to Steve Rogers. It also seems like our cat is magical and taught Astra how to teleport on her own."

Loki arched an eyebrow. "That's interesting. How did you accidentally summon a magical cat, anyway?"

She shrugged. "Beats me." She had been sitting on the floor with her legs folded underneath her. She slowly pushed herself up, stretching and getting the feeling back into her legs. "Our magical cat is the least of our worries, though. It appears that Astra had a vision while we were away as well. She saw you fighting with someone that sounded like they had equal magical powers." She went on to describe just the dream in more detail.

Loki's face pulled into a worried frown. "I know who it is."

Phoenix sighed and rolled her eyes. "Another secret enemy, Loki? I thought we were past this."

He caught her reference to Thanos. "It's not the same. It's someone from my past. I only hope that we can keep this from happening at all. We need to head back."

She nodded. "We'll head back in the morning. Right now I need to sleep." He nodded in return, picking her up and cradling her to his chest and gallantly carrying her off to bed.


	7. Chapter 7

Things the Avengers Aren't Allowed to Do, Pt. 1

(Takes place about one year after the end of 'Redemption.')

In the past year, it seemed like time, for once, was flying by for Phoenix. She had never understood exactly what the phrase 'time flies when you're having fun' really meant, mainly because she couldn't really remember a time when she had truly been happy and having fun. Plus, the long she lived, the more time truly dragged out for her.

However, it seemed like only yesterday that Phoenix had went into labor with her daughter and had nearly killed everyone around her. She was still certain that Astra would be her only child after the complete hell that she had went through. Then again, she couldn't exactly figure out a way to 'impregnate' Loki, either. Not that he couldn't carry a child, but more that *she* wasn't a shape shifter as well. Maybe Astra would just have to settle for being her only child.

Even though she was supposed to help the Avengers as well as Loki now, she still managed to get out of things from time to time. As she once explained to Fury, how the hell was she supposed to find a babysitter at the last minute all the time, especially when someone was attacking the city? She wondered if any of these other 'Avengers' would eventually be having children of their own? Of course, she had never seen any of them really date anyone, either. Maybe there was a reason for that? Who wanted to deal with someone who had to run off at a moment's notice? The only one of them that Phoenix was sure had anyone to date was Thor, after all. She was still certain that was pure luck on his part. Also, unless they dated one another (or Tony, who had no sense of keeping things secret), they were supposed to keep some sense of secret identities as well. Of course, the idea of that only made her laugh. This was the age of the internet. They were even instances of _very_ old pictures of her popping up and people wondering if she were a time traveler. The only person that she knew of who was a time traveler was Nicholas Cage!

"Come on, Astra," Phoenix cooed to her young child, who was already sleeping so well that it took nothing short of a freight train to rouse her in the mornings. "It's time to get up." Her child whined, and Phoenix just laughed and disentangled the child from her blankets, pulling her out of the bed even as she fussed. "Come on, dear. I've got a long day and I have to drop you off with your Aunt Jane."

She had to attend one of those dreadful meetings with Fury today. They really did need to find a way to spice those damn things up. She had a few ideas as to what to do, but she was certain that would only lead to another thing being added to the list of things that they weren't supposed to do. Then again, finding new rules to break was fun, wasn't it?

After getting her cranky child dressed and fed, she headed off to the apartment that Jane Foster had in the city. "Are you sure this is alright?" Phoenix asked her. In the past year, the two women had gotten a bit more used to one another. They actually bonded over the idea that Jane was dying to start a family with Thor as well, but they were having some issues. Phoenix's wedding to Loki had been a simple matter, but Thor and Jane had to go through all sorts of other royal hoops before they could get married on Asgard. "I'm sorry that I only called you yesterday. I'm convinced that Fury has no idea what it's like to have a family to plan around."

"Oh it's fine!" Jane said as she took the baby bag from Phoenix, putting it down before taking the baby as well. "Like I'd ever turn down a bonding day with my little niece." Even though they weren't technically married yet, they might as well have been. Thor was even living with her now. "I'm surprised that they don't do some sort of daycare at the headquarters, though."

Phoenix made a face. "I'd hate to think of Fury being in the same building as any children," she said with a groan. "Although the idea of him reading any bedtime stories to children is actually quite entertaining," she admitted with a laugh.

"Oh, it would likely involve a lot of 'go the 'F' to sleep' things," Jane said, giggling. "Honestly, I'd almost pay to see him do just that. Just, you know, not with any children that I'd be worried about him scaring."

"I'm sure that Astra could handle him for an afternoon," Phoenix said with a bit of an evil grin. "Another time, though. He really should be shown that it's hard to find a babysitter on such short notice."

Her smile became softer and she pressed a kiss to her child's forehead. "I should only be gone for a few hours, dear, unless someone tries to end the world again. If I run late, I'll make sure to call, OK?"

With a few more goodbyes, she headed out, only running a few minutes late, as she had to make a pit stop along the way. Something that she was sure would spice up the meeting that she had to sit through today. If this didn't make her day more interesting, then she was certain that nothing would.

OoOoOoOo

"Glad that everyone could join us today," Fury said, casting a glance toward Phoenix when she sat down. She had only been five minutes late, and she was the last one to arrive, so that was actually a good record, but he would still rather everyone arrive on time. He was also certain that it was Stark who usually wore the sunglasses indoors, not her. Maybe she really was spending too much time with her 'pet.' (Yes, he did know fully about the 'odd' relationship that they shared, and he thought they were all insane.)

"Just had to run some errands first, Fury," Phoenix said with a grin. "Don't you worry your pretty little head about it."

Fury shook his head, and, when he turned his back to start the PowerPoint that he wanted to show them, she passed something to Tony under the table. When he looked at her, confused for a second, she just made a 'drinking' motion to him. She had gotten a few flasks and filled them all with tequila. OK, and she might have downed a few bottles of it before she came in here. It took a lot more to get her drunk than it did for a normal human. She just needed something...ANYTHING to make these meetings less annoying.

Grinning at him, she unscrewed the cap on hers and took a quick sip, hiding it back underneath the table before Fury turned around. The next time Fury was turned away, she passed two to Loki and Thor. She had the rest passed around by the fourth time he wasn't looking at them. Only Steve had declined, whispering that he couldn't get drunk so there was no point for tequila for him.

It had only taken twenty minutes after that for things to devolve into complete chaos.

While Loki and Thor were mostly fine, as they simply hadn't had enough to drink, the rest of them had quickly turned into something that you would only see at a drunken frat party. They had only managed to hide for a very short time that they were drunk around Fury, although they made his anger worse when Phoenix suggested that they should take a shot every time that the vein on Fury's forehead throbbed.

They were pretty sure that Clint was going to need his stomach pumped by the end of the meeting. The meeting had only ended when Fury, disgusted with them all, stormed out of the room.

"Really...tequila?" Steve asked Phoenix. "You couldn't even buy them anything _nice_?"

"Hey! Tequila can be very _nice_," Phoenix protested. "Come on! If you tried it, you might like it. I know...can't get drunk. That's an incredible _bummer_. Isn't there anything you can take for that? Like a pill or something?"

"A pill to allow me to get drunk?" Steve asked. "Why on earth would I want to take that?"

Phoenix just started giggling. "Tony! Start making a pill that will allow Steve to get drunk!" she ordered him.

"I'm your pet, not your lab monkey!" Tony snapped. "Make your minion do it!" he said, looking over at Bruce, who was shaking his head.

"Someone's a grumpy puppy," Loki said, lifting his wife out of her chair and standing up. "Now that we've completely destroyed another Fury meeting, it might be time for us to leave." He had drank some of the tequila as well, but Phoenix had a good head start on him. Once standing, he teleported the both of them out of the room.

"My brother certainly managed to find the only other creature on the planet that can cause as much chaos as him," Thor said with a slight grin, standing up. "Come on, Anthony," he said, pulling the billionaire up from his chair. "Lady Pepper will not be happy with you getting drunk so early in the day. I only hope she has some sort of cure for you."

"Yeah, her 'cure' usually involves buckets of ice water. Don't take me to her!" Tony protested, trying to squirm out of Thor's grip and failing miserably.

"Don't be a bad 'puppy,' Tony," Clint teased. He and Natasha had participated in the drinking as well, but Natasha had one of the more insane constitutions anyone had ever seen when it came to alcohol. Clint, however, looked a sheet or two in the wind already. "If you're a puppy to them, are you like a purse Chihuahua or something? She does baby you like one," he said with a snicker.

Tony made a face. "I'm at least a beagle," he protested, flailing when Thor actually threw him over his shoulder and carried him out of the room.

OoOoOoOo

The next day, everyone received emails from Coulson.

_Avengers, _

_From this point forward, any alcohol that is brought into meetings will be confiscated. If you come in drunk, you will be put into our newly built 'drunk tank.' If we think that you have brought alcohol into the meeting, we WILL frisk you and confiscate it. _

_Agent Phil Coulson_

Phoenix laughed so hard at the email that she woke the baby up.

(Author's Note: If you have not read them yet, PLEASE go and Google '62 Things the Avengers are Not Allowed to Do.' A few more will likely show up in here, but unfortunately I will NOT be doing a fic for all of them. If you want to read a fic for all of them, please go and look up the story '62 Things the Avengers are Not Allowed to Do' by Kaitaru Seras Viktoria Hatake. It's awesome and hilarious. I will likely only be picking five or so that really tickle my fancy to include on here. Hope you enjoyed!)


	8. Chapter 8

Discussions:

(Takes place between chapter 7 and the epilogue of 'Revenge.' Will lead into the epilogue and likely a little bit past it.)

Phoenix wasn't sure where Loki had come up with this idea that he was trying to explain to her. She just knew that, for once, she wasn't totally sure that Loki was in his right mind. Sure, wanting to take over the world? Attacking people to get revenge? Those things were normal to her. What Loki was talking about now? It sounded just this side of insane.

She had been curled up on her sofa when he came over, starting to explain the idea that he had. In need of a way to get away from the heat she was feeling at the moment, she had been wearing just a white wife beater and a pair of shorts. Loki, however, managed to look regal as always, even in just a pair of loose khaki pants and a green button up. Why couldn't she look that great no matter what she wore?

"Are you sure that this is what you want to do, Loki?" Phoenix asked him. They had spent the last few months in Argentina, and she was perfectly happy to spend at least the rest of her pregnancy there. She wanted to hide away from the rest of the world for all time, and the mountains of South America seemed the best way to do it.

Loki, however, seemed to have a few other ideas. "Do you really think that we can hide forever?" he asked her.

"I was willing to give it a good old fashioned try," she said quickly, hand reaching down to her stomach, starting to poke out for the first time in her long life. "Technically, all we have to do is wait for most of those 'Avengers' to die. That's what, sixty years, tops? I don't think it will really take that long. They live the kind of lives that will get them killed sooner rather than later."

"Well, we'll never just 'outlive' Thor, dear," Loki said to her, reaching over and stroking her hair. "Or my parents, or anyone on Asgard." She could tell that there were other things on his mind as well, but right now she wanted to see just what he was meaning by this nonsense. "I think I know what we need to do, but you're not going to like it."

She just stared at him for a moment before realizing what he wanted to do. "Oh jeeze no. I don't want to work with them," she said with a pout. "Most of them are idiots, or holier than thou...or _Tony Stark_," she said with a groan.

"I don't exactly like them, either," Loki admitted. "We can't just think about us, though." As she laid down on the sofa next to him, he reached down and pressed a hand gently against her stomach. "We have to think about the baby as well."

She kept pouting at him. "When did you get all level headed?" she asked him, glaring for a moment before giving up and resting her head on his thigh. "I'm not sure if I like this new side of you," she teased.

"One of us has to think clearly," he teased right back.

"Fine," she said with a grumble. "When do we have to do this?"

"Soon," he told her. "Especially before you or I change our minds." She shut her eyes when he started to stroke her hair again. "We need a good world to protect our child with, even if it means aligning ourselves with the goody goody two shoes that live in New York." Well, at least she could tell that he was liking the idea about as much as she was.

"Like we couldn't make a good world on our own," she remarked. She turned slightly so that she could look up at him. "You're worried about something. You know I can read you better than you'd like to admit." She was sure that he thought no one should be able to read the emotions of the 'God of Lies,' but she could do it pretty well just the same. "What's going on inside that head of yours?" she asked, reaching up with one hand and stroking it across his cheek.

He sighed, bringing up his own hand and pressing it against hers, holding it against his face. "I'm not really worried about anything on this planet," he told her. "There's so much more out there than you know about, though. Some things that might start looking really hard at this realm and starting to think that they can take it as their own."

She laughed. "Who? People like us?" she asked him, grinning.

He didn't return her smile, though. "Things much worse than we can dream of being." He kept holding her hand, and she couldn't help but relishing in the feel of his cool skin. "I just want to make sure that all three of us are well protected."

She knew that look on his face. That was a look that was saying that he knew even more than what he was saying, but he didn't want to talk about everything he knew right now. She wanted to press him for more information, but she knew that she likely wasn't going to get anything out of him, not right now, anyway. She finally nodded. "Alright, we can head back up to New York. We just need to make sure that we stay off the radar until we get there. I'd rather do this on my own terms rather than get picked up and be tossed into a cell."

OoOoOoOo

It had taken them a little while to get back to New York. They had to travel incognito, and that was hard enough when you were pregnant, much less when you were two wanted criminals. It involved a lot of stolen cars, plenty of pit stops, and one cranky cat who had to spend all of his time in the back of cars or in Phoenix's lap (when she wasn't in a pissed off mood).

Arriving in New York and talking to the Avengers had been almost easy. Well, there was a lot of angry accusations and Phoenix tossing Tony through a wall, but that was almost a good day between the two sets of people. After the long chat with them, Phoenix had headed up to the roof of Stark Tower, more than content to just allow for them to call Fury and have him arrive so that they could talk to him.

She was sitting on the ledge of the building, her legs actually dangling off. If she were anyone but herself, this would have been a dangerous thing for her to do. However, she had good balance and didn't fear heights. She wasn't too worried.

When she heard someone walking up behind her, she leaned back on her hands and turned around, spotting Tony Stark coming up, a little bit of plaster in his hair. "You really do have a lovely view up here, Stark," she said to him. "I didn't get to enjoy it the last time I stopped by."

"Yeah, you were too busy trying to take over the city, if I remember correctly," Tony remarked, sitting down beside her, but not hanging his legs off the building. "I'm actually not here to argue with you, though, so let's stop that train of thought before it goes too far."

She nodded and laid back, relaxing against the ground while keeping her legs hanging off. "So, what exactly _do_ you want to talk about? I kind of doubt that you're here just to take in the view with me," she told him.

"Well, first off, Fury is coming by. He wants to hear all the stuff that you two told us," he told her. "I truly have no idea that how he's going to take all of this, though. He might err on the side of 'hey, better working with us than against us,' and, since he employs people like Widow, he probably will, but don't bet on it until it happens," he explained.

"Are you _concerned_ for my well being, Stark" she asked playfully. She turned her head to look at him with a smile.

"I'm...admittedly curious to see exactly what sort of offspring that the two of you would produce," Tony said, trying to sound nonchalant. "And any way that I can get you to repay for those paintings is good for me."

"Are you **still** hung up on those bloody paintings?" she groaned, sitting back up. "If I had enough cash, I'd give it back to you just so that you'd hush up about it!" She really did think that this was just too much over some canvas and paints.

"And then you'd likely burn something else of mine just to be spiteful,"he snapped at her.

She shrugged. "Possibly. I am kind of a bitch," she admitted with a laugh. "When is Fury going to get here, anyway? I have things to do and an apartment to gain and set up and I don't have time to sit around and wait for him to arrive."

"Well that's good, because I don't have time for bullshit," the deep voice of Nick Fury rang out behind her.

She groaned, turning around and looking at the tall, dark man. "No bullshit this time, Fury," she told him. "I'm a little too pregnant to be running around lighting things on fire, anyway."

"That's more or less what your crazy boyfriend told me," Fury told her. "Then again, I trust him more than I trust you. I _still_ have no idea how you got a fake ID past us."

She rolled her eyes. "I bought a birth certificate with the right birthday of a child who died, and then lived the ID from high school on, Fury. It's amazing what a bit of make up and the right clothes will do for a girl, like making her look like she was anything from her teens to her late twenties to early thirties. It's not that bloody hard." She laid back on the ground again. "Besides, you found me as an assassin. It's not like you were expecting a full background as it was."

She watched as Fury visibly relaxed a touch. "I suppose you have a point there," he admitted. "We didn't exactly think that we would find much in your background that would be consistent. Why the hell did you work for SHIELD in the first place, though? That's what I don't understand."

"When you're as old as me and alone, it's really only a matter of finding something to do to pass the years," she admitted to him, staring up at the sky. "Then you find someone who claims to be a god and can seem to back it up? Well, that tends to throw you for a loop and make you do some wild things." Like fall in love, apparently. She really hadn't planned that.

"I'm willing to work with the two of you, at least for now," Fury said to her, seemingly mentally chewing on her admission. "You'll be kept under watch, obviously, and the minute that you slip up...I'm sure that you can put together what will happen."

She waved him off. "Yeah, I can put it together," she told him. "You have made this pretty damn clear." She just wanted the man to go away so that she could start planning for an apartment. At least now she didn't have to hide, anymore. When Fury walked away, she turned and looked at Tony. "So, do you know of any good furniture stores? I've got an apartment to furnish."

Tony nodded. "Yeah, I think that I can give you a few places to go," he said, smiling a bit. "I'm assuming that you want high class shit, though. I'm not gonna take you to some rent a place that you can lease crappy stuff."

She shook her head. "Oh I'm sure that you would only take me to the best. You have...impeccable taste, after all," she said, reaching up and dusting the remaining plaster out of his hair.


	9. Chapter 9

Poptarts: 

(Takes place a few weeks before 'The Adventures of Tony and Astra')

(Thank you to Amy for the idea.)

Today was supposed to be a quiet day. No one was trying to kill them or attack the city right now, so Phoenix didn't have the worry about someone attacking her or her family. There wasn't even a meeting with Fury and the Avengers, so she didn't have to pretend to be interested or find a way to pass the time during those. (Fury no longer allowed alcohol at these meetings, so now they were even more boring.)

For what was to be a slow day, Phoenix figured that she could invite Thor and Jane over for some family time. She really did enjoy spending time with them now, although sometimes Thor was a bit on the...boisterous side. Astra seemed to be in utter love with her uncle Thor, so it wasn't that bad. Then again, Astra was a sweet, if mischievous child. She even had her tolerance for Steve. If that didn't make her an angel, Phoenix wasn't sure what did.

When Thor and Jane arrived at the apartment, Astra ran up to Thor, wrapping her arms around his large leg as best as she could. "My lovely niece!" he called out, picking her up and swinging her around.

"Thank the gods we have high ceilings," Phoenix remarked with a smirk. Loki was so damn tall and so was Thor, plus he had a tendency to lift Astra up and swing her around like his hammer when he did so. "Or else my daughter would get a bump to the head every time you stopped by for a visit."

Thor laughed as he set Astra back down. "I'll have you know that I take care not to hold Astra up too high," he said. "I have brought a present for her, though. I wanted to introduce her to the glory of Poptarts!" He showed her a bag that, yes, was full of several flavors of Poptarts.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't convince him that she was too young to eat that sort of stuff," Jane said apologetically. Astra simply chanted 'presents' and tried to pull down the bag toward herself so that she could dig into it.

"Dear me," Phoenix said with a sigh. "You know if Loki was here, he would toss those damn things out the window?" Loki would be home soon. He had been spending most of the day with Tony Stark, as the inventor had wanted to see if magic and machines could mix in any way. Phoenix would have _liked_ to watch the disaster in the making, but she didn't want her child around any exploding things.

Phoenix walked over and looked through the bag for a minute before picking out the strawberry flavored ones, heading over to the toaster so that it could heat the Poptarts. "You're only getting one," she said to Astra. "You really shouldn't be having too much sugar at your age, but your Uncle Thor brought you a gift, so I'm not going to deny it."

Thor let out a whoop of joy, and Phoenix caught Jane rolling her eyes. "I still have no idea as to why you think that these things are pure ambrosia," Phoenix said as she popped several of the things into her toaster and pressing them down so that they would warm up. "They're just...bread, sugar, and fruit flavoring."

"We have nothing like them in Asgard," Thor commented. "I cannot even begin to explain how great they are." Phoenix cast a glance toward Jane, who just shrugged. "They are much better than ambrosia. Ambrosia is too sticky sweet to be anything worthwhile. I have no idea why the Greek gods like it so much."

"I never got to meet any, but their presence was there for a while. I heard they even bathed in the stuff," Phoenix commented lightly as she moved around the kitchen, looking for drinks for all of them. She ended up making coffee for her, Jane, and Thor, and a glass of milk for Astra.

"Wait a minute, are you telling me that the Greek gods are real, too?" Jane asked, looking at them, confused and disbelieving.

"You believe the Norse gods were the only ones that were real?" Phoenix asked, an eyebrow arched at her. "I lived through what you would now call 'ancient Greece.' Anyone could easily feel Zeus and the others' presence. I was never 'blessed' to meet one, at least I don't think so, but trust me. They were a very active bunch."

"Where are you from, originally?" Jane asked.

Phoenix turned as the Poptarts popped out of the toaster. She put one each on a paper towel and passed them around. "Let it cool," she said quickly to Astra. "Well, I'm supposed to be from Asgard, I suppose, but I suppose I'm Greek if I'm anything. That's where I woke up, anyway. The people had barely gather Greece into city states, then, though. I think I woke up near Sparta," Phoenix explained. "Don't let that ridiculous 300 movie like to you. I saw that bloody thing and laughed. Do you know why they could only focus on war? They had slaves, hundreds of thousands of them. That movie talked about freedom, but they only cared about freedom to keep doing what they wanted to do, which was train for war and have boys." She grinned. "Oh, Athens wasn't the only place that did that, either."

"You really are just a font of history, aren't you?" Jane asked. "I need to make Darcy meet you sometime when she comes into the city again. I bet the two of you could talk all day about that kind of stuff."

"Well, I only came to the Americas in the 1940s, so there are some things that I missed, obviously," Phoenix remarked. She watched her daughter cautiously bite into her Poptart, then, deciding that she liked it and that it wasn't too hot, started to eat more of it. "And then I went to Argentina for at least ten years. I didn't make it to the United States until sometime in the...sixties, I think? I traveled, yes, but I spent most of my time in Europe. It's the place that I knew and was comfortable in, even though most thought I was a prostitute or I had to masquerade as a man." When Jane looked at her, she continued. "I hated wearing head coverings. It was easier to pretend to be a man, but no one paid attention to prostitutes, either, so each worked well when I needed it to."

She smiled as she took a bite of her Poptart. "Recipe must have gotten better for these things. They are better than I remember," Phoenix said.

"You've lived a crazy life, huh?" Jane asked, picking up her Poptart and starting to eat it as well. "I can't even imagine what it was like to walk through ancient Greece or Rome."

"Messy, compared to now," Phoenix commented. "Horses aren't exactly known for using the toilet in a corner, after all."

Thor nearly choked on his Poptart.

"What? I know you use horses in Asgard. Tell me it's not true," Phoenix demanded.

"At least we have servants who keep our streets clean," Thor commented once he managed to swallow his Poptart.

"Then you prove yourself to be more technologically advance," Phoenix said quickly, turning to her daughter. "How do you like your Poptart, sweetheart?" she asked.

Astra nodded. "Good!" she said with a grin, causing everyone to laugh.

"You can have another one for breakfast tomorrow," Phoenix told her. She looked over at a clock. "When the bloody hell is Loki coming home? I would think that Tony had blown up enough stuff by now to be done."

As if on cue, a slightly singed Loki popped into the room. He was wearing more normal clothing today, a simple blue t-shirt and jeans, and soot covered both. "That was an interesting day," he commented, walking over to the kitchen table everyone was sitting at. He saw the Poptarts and looked over at Thor. "I suppose that this is your doing?"

Thor nodded. "I wanted my niece to experience the wonder that is Poptarts!" he said with a wide grin.

"He has gained another convert to the Church of Poptarts," Phoenix said, laughing and rolling her eyes. "I'm not sure that there is anything to be done now." She looked back up at Loki. "What on earth happened to you?"

"Tony had to learn firsthand and magic and machinery do not mix," Loki explained. "I was happy to give him the lesson."

"And now I'm very glad that Astra and I did not attend," Phoenix said with a sigh.

(Author's Note, part 2: I have the first chapter of the next full sequel in the series done, but I am at a loss for a name. It's going to be heavily action packed, so if anyone has any ideas, PLEASE throw some at me. I'd love to hear them.)


	10. Chapter 10

(Author's Note: Sorry for this taking me so long, but guess who lost their jump drive and ONCE AGAIN lost any will to write while it was gone? MMMMEEEEEE! Ugh, I need to put that thing on a chain and attach it to myself. This is not the first time it's happened. Anyway, on with the show!)

Weekend Visit: 

(Takes place a few weeks before 'Poptarts.')

(Once again, thank you Amy for the idea.)

"Are you sure that this is a good idea, Loki?" Phoenix was feeling apprehensive. Even though they had been reassured repeatedly, she still felt odd about the idea of going to Asgard, much less bringing their daughter along with them. So far, Odin and Frigga had visited several times to Midgard, but Loki and Phoenix had yet to reciprocate. She still had the worry in the back of her head that someone would try to throw them in a dungeon. Loki had been a renegade there and she hadn't exactly shown herself to be in good standing on Midgard, plus there's that whole 'Ragnarok' thing. Phoenix genuinely feared that someone (likely not Frigga, Thor, or Odin but still SOMEONE) might try to bind her somehow. Odin had banished her without memory once. She still had no memory before waking up on Midgard, alone and desolate.

"No one will try to do anything to us, Phe," Loki swore to her. "I know what you fear, and it's a worry to me as well, but I do not think that my parents or Thor will let anything truly happen to us." Despite everything, it was nice to hear Loki refer to Frigga and Odin as his parents. That alone had taken so long, much longer with Odin than Frigga, obviously. It wasn't just she who had helped to 'fix' Loki, as much as he needed fixing. He had needed his family back. She had simply needed family. Getting what they both so desperately needed had done them both a world of good.

The two of them were in their bedroom of their apartment, packing bags for what was supposed to be a weekend visit to his family in Asgard. She had to admit that she was curious to see Asgard. Thor did love to spin tales about the place. She couldn't imagine it matching up to her brother-in-law's boasting, even when Loki quietly agreed that it was just as wonderful as claimed.

"Socks isn't going to like...explode or anything when we bring him, is he?" Phoenix asked him. She had no idea how well the cat would take to traveling between planets. He was coming along in a pet carrier, which was just an odd thing to carry around in that kind of travel, but Astra was insisting that the cat get to come along, and Phoenix didn't have it in her to argue.

"Phoenix, the cat is *not* going to explode," Loki said with a laugh. "Why are you being so neurotic?"

He was right; this wasn't like her at all. "This is our first time going to Asgard together. I think it would be stranger if I wasn't nervous, don't you think?"

He nodded. "It's not that I don't understand it," he explained. When she sat down on the bed, he sat next to her, taking her hand. "I just don't want you to worry yourself to death. Thor and Mother alone will make sure that nothing will happen to us. Anyone else who does try to hurt us will find some nasty surprises in store for them."

Phoenix couldn't help but smile at the last part. "Now that's the Loki I fell for," she said playfully. She hoped that it didn't come to anything like that, though. She'd rather this visit go well and be stress-free. Still, she was glad that he would do something if things came to that.

OoOoOoOo

If Phoenix had ever traveled between realms before, it wasn't something that she remembered, and the trip nearly made her vomit. She had no idea how Loki and Thor did this on a semi-regular basis. When they arrived in Asgard, she could hear Socks howling in his cage, although, when she looked in on him, he appeared to be fine. "I don't believe our cat likes interplanetary travel," she said with a grin, looking back up at Loki. Thor had accompanied them along on the trip as well, along with Jane. This simply seemed to be the 'bring the girlfriends/wives to Asgard' weekend.

Before anyone could respond to her worry over her cat, a very large black man came up to all of them. "King Odin and Queen Frigga are waiting for you outside," he said to all of them.

"Thank you, Heimdall," Thor said, leading the way outside. Everyone else followed.

"So, that's the famous Heimdall," Phoenix said as they walked. Even something as simple as 'heading outside' seemed to take forever in this large place.

"I believe he still hates me," Loki said as they walked.

"You _did_ freeze the man," Thor countered. "It's amazing that he's still alive."

"Oh he was healed and lived," Loki grumbled. "And I did say that I was sorry."

"Sometimes it takes actions instead of just words to make up for past mistakes," Frigga spoke as they finally made it outside. "I'm so glad that all of you are here. Welcome to Asgard."

"Oh my god," Jane said, spinning around so that she could look at the beautiful skyline. "It's so stunning here."

Phoenix had to admit that she was a bit more amazed by the 'rainbow bridge' underneath their feet, but she was actually stunned to the point of speechlessness. She wondered just how a place like this had so easily developed interplanetary travel and yet still depended on horses to get around. "I will admit; this place does live up to Thor's boasting."

"I am glad that for once my son does no exaggerate," Odin said, laughing. He leaned down and peaked into the cat carrier, looking upon a still slightly agitated Socks. "Your pet does not seem to be very pleased right now."

"I don't think traveling between realms agrees with him," Loki said with a grin. "Astra won't travel anywhere without him. So, we just had to hope that he would survive the ride."

Phoenix swatted his shoulder. "You said that he would be fine."

"Yes, I knew he would be, but it's fun to tease you," Loki replied with a grin.

"You're such an ass," Phoenix snapped, hitting him again.

"You know that actually hurts when you do that, right?" Loki asked, rubbing the shoulder where Phoenix had just hit him.

"Good," Odin said with a smile. "I do believe that truer words have never been spoken about Loki. He can be an ass sometimes." Phoenix had to laugh at that. After all the hurt that had went on with this family (and some resentments against them that she had held herself), it was nice to see them getting along so well. If the rest of this visit went as well as this part seemed to be going, then maybe she really had been worrying over nothing.

Frigga and Odin showed them around the grounds, and everyone saw parts of Asgard that had changed since Loki had last been there. Jane oozed and ached over every little thing that she had seen, and, while Phoenix was much quieter, the sights amazed her as well. She personally wondered if there was anything that she should remember about this place, if she did have memories. She wasn't sure when she was sent away, any memories she might have wiped clean by Odin's magic. She didn't want to reflect on things that bothered her, but seeing the entirety of the splendor around her made her wonder just that.

Later on, they were allowed to head to their own quarters, Thor and Jane heading to Thor's chambers and Loki and Phoenix heading to Loki's old quarters. Phoenix couldn't quite hide the smile that spread across her face when she saw Loki's room, still scattered with plenty of books that she knew he had likely once used. Astra had been following along beside them mostly during the trip and, after putting her down for a nap (with Socks curled up on the bed beside her); Phoenix started to explore the room, mostly looking through the books that were scattered about.

"Exactly how much reading did you do when you used to live here?" she asked, flipping open one of the tombs, seeing the now very familiar handwriting in the margins of ideas that he wanted to use the many spells in the book for.

Loki was sitting on the bed, pulling off his boots. "Lots," he admitted to her. "I wasn't exactly popular around here." He relaxed back onto the bed. "From some of the looks that were sent my way during our little tour, I still don't think I'm too popular."

Phoenix sighed and walked over to him, reaching for him and stroking his face. "Do not worry about them," she said sweetly. "The people who matter want you around, don't they? It's like you said; your family will not let anything happen to us here."

OoOoOoOo

The evening was spent in celebration, with feasting and talks of past battles. While Thor's friends, called Lady Sif, Hogun, Fandral, and Volstagg, were friendly toward Jane, they seemed cool toward Loki and Phoenix. Loki had expected as much. It seemed that his wife had expected just as much, as she seemed happy to pay them no mind as well. They had both gotten to the point that they could read each other's emotions quite well.

Their daughter just seemed highly entertained by everyone and everything around them. While most seemed uneasy around the two of them, everyone seemed to delight in their toddler child. Maybe it was simply because she was young and didn't have the past histories of either of her parents. Even when she somehow turned Fandral's mead into moose piss. Loki wasn't sure where his daughter had learned to do something like that, and filed it into the back of his mind, even as he laughed.

Still, even Loki had to admit that this was a bit boring. He had never really been interested in these feats and celebrations before his time away from Asgard. He could see that, after a while, the curiosity had worn off with his wife as well. He wondered if she had attended anything like these feasts during older times on Midgard. Like him, she didn't discuss much of her past. She claimed not even to know how many years that she had even been on Midgard. She did occasionally joke to him that she was likely older than even he. His understanding of the older tales, although he knew that they were exaggerated and changed to keep anyone from finding her, told him that she was likely the same age as his father, even though she looked his age instead.

He also knew, from her own words, that there was something about her that prevented her from actually dying. He had picked her name from the Greek myth that she had likely inspired (what she called her 'native' tongue was most ancient of Greek, so he could only assume) of the bird that was reborn from its own ashes. He initially thought that it might be some spell his father had put on her, but that made no sense. It was more likely something more ancient due to her supposed 'role' in Ragnarok. He still believed that it was some misunderstanding of a prophecy. The damn thing had called her a male as well, after all, and he could certainly attest to the fact that she was all female.

Other parts of his lovely life were still a mystery to him, though. He knew that, if he asked, she would answer any question he might have, but then she would ask questions herself.

Maybe some things were just better off not being known.

OoOoOoOo

Frigga insisted upon spending extra time with her granddaughter, so Loki and Phoenix left her with her, heading off to their room by themselves. "Enjoy the evening?" Loki asked her as they walked inside.

"Interesting enough," Phoenix said as she relaxed onto the bed. She was uncomfortable in the Asgardian clothing, as she did not like floor length dresses, but she thought that she would be polite enough to wear what was given to her here. "A bit heavy on the story telling for my taste. I got plenty of that in the people who used to worship you a thousand years ago."

"So you were around there when we would have visited," Loki mused, smiling. "Just how did you get missed?"

"I spent a lot of time searching that realm for any like me," Phoenix said softly. "When I didn't find any, I moved on." Her blue eyes flickered up to meet his. "It appears that I may have moved on too early."

"I'm sure my father would have done something to you if he had spotted you there," Loki said quickly. "We met when we were supposed to, Phe." She supposed that he was right. Odin likely would have done something then. She would have been lucky if he had only put her down for another nap of some sort.

"Good point," she said quickly. She grinned up at him and beckoned him with her hand. "Why don't you come here and peel this wretched dress off me then, since we have the room to ourselves for a bit."

Loki grinned, bending down toward the bed and her, crawling on top of her and pressing his lips against hers.

OoOoOoOo

Loki and Phoenix had gotten so 'busy' with one another that they had actually forgotten a little bit about their daughter, falling asleep without thinking to check on her. When they woke up the next morning, Loki first, they both ended up feeling a small amount of panic when they realized that their daughter was not in the room with them. They had quickly gotten dressed, both arming themselves in a worry that she might have been taken. They were both too concerned to think clearly.

However, a very quick search showed just how much they should fear. It wasn't a kidnapping that they had to worry about.

No, it was worse.

It was a tea party.

Loki and Phoenix had stormed into a room, worried about what they might find, only to see their daughter at the head of a small table, sitting with Frigga, Jane, and one scrunched up Thor, having a delicate little tea party while Socks danced around their legs, working for treats.

"Mommy, Daddy! Join us or tea!" Astra exclaimed. "I spent last night with Grandmamma and she showed me her tea set!"

Phoenix relaxed her stance, sighing in relief. "I'm sorry if she kept you awake or anything," she said, bowing slightly to Frigga.

"No trouble at all," Frigga said with a wave of her hand, bending down slightly to feed some sort of sweet cake to the cat. "I hope that I didn't worry the two of you last night, keeping Astra with me. You should have seen Odin giving her a ride on his shoulders."

Both Loki and Phoenix blushed. "Don't worry. We didn't fret too badly," Loki said, looking away. "Not last night, anyway."


	11. Chapter 11

Why Do You Still Bother? :

(Takes place after the last chapter of 'Second in Command' and goes all the way to the first chapter of 'Revenge.')

(Author's Note: This plot bunny came RIGHT after I updated last time and decided not to leave me the hell alone. Gotta love it when that happens. This is what happened to Loki and what he was told when he was first apprehended and taken back to Asgard.)

Loki had seen the hurt and anger in Phoenix's eyes right before she fled. He did not know when, how, or even why she had started to actually care about him, but it had happened. She was someone that strictly cared only about him and not Thor, instead. He had chased her away, but it was for her own good. He did not want to see her in chains beside him, and right now, he was too broken to flee properly.

When Loki was finally able to move, he pulled himself out of the hole in the floor. The beast had actually made holes in the floor with his body. Just as he was able to put himself into a sitting position, he heard movement behind him. He moved and turned himself around, seeing all of the self-styled 'Avengers' posing behind him, ready to attack.

Loki looked up at Stark. "If it's all the same to you, I'll have that drink now," he said flippantly. He groaned slightly when Rogers reached down and jerked him off the ground by one of his arms.

Rogers glared at him. What did he expect Loki to do? Apologize? Beg for forgiveness? That was highly laughable. "You're under arrest," Rogers gritted out to him. Loki grinned at him before spitting a mouthful of blood on his shoes.

OoOoOoOo

They had thrown him in another cell. The only reason that he hadn't already escaped was that it seemed that Thor had brought along a gag and a set of chains from Asgard. For all of Thor's talk of 'coming home,' he seemed to have been prepared to bring Loki back as a prisoner. Loki wasn't too concerned. It just wasn't in him to be, not about _Thor._ There were much more important things to be concerned about, and much more important beings.

He spent one night in the jail of SHIELD, his not-brother coming to talk to him, to plead with him. Loki was barely sure of what he wanted, though. He turned him out mostly, letting Thor babble his nonsense, and, when he was spent, leaving him in silence. Loki wondered what he could have done differently. He should have tossed away that bloody arrow from Barton, for one. Phoenix had even been trying to warn him that his arrows did things, like explode. At least then, they wouldn't have been blown out of the sky and he directly into the beast's path. He also should have run from that large green thing instead of taunting it. As if it would understand any sort of reason.

None of the other Avengers came to visit him, thankfully. Loki wasn't sure if he could take any sort of gloating on their parts. They actually thought that they had won. It was amusing to think about. They were creatures who lived such short life spans. Worse come to worse, he could simply wait them out and watch them grow old and die. Even the man out of time would eventually age.

This was merely a momentary setback.

He also had a woman on the outside, as long as she didn't let her anger get her in trouble. She was likely to light a town on fire with that anger of hers. He had certainly gained a fiery creature as his companion. He wasn't entirely sure what to make of her, but something deep inside of him told him that she would do what she could to get him back, even if that took raiding Asgard on her own to do so. He hoped that it didn't come to that.

The next day, when they gathered to send him back to Asgard with Thor, he felt her nearby. He had felt her nearby the day before, too, even when he ordered her to leave. Now she was closer, possibly even too close for her own good. It took a bit of searching, but he spotted her. For someone who claimed to hate hiding, she was good at it. It seemed that none of the others had spotted her, not even she SHIELD agents who were hidden away themselves, watching as he was sent back.

She was poised and ready for attack. He knew that things would go badly if she did so now. He could see that she was still badly hurt from the day before, still favoring one leg over the other. Anything she did now would likely just get her caught as well, and sending her away yesterday would have been for nothing.

_Don't_. He did not want to have her lose herself to her anger. Not here. He watched as she looked around before realizing that he was speaking in her mind.

_Why not?_ He had nearly fallen over when he felt her burning white hot rage come through with her mental message. She was even angrier than he had expected. Her anger actually touched him a little, surrounded by people who either pitied him (Thor) or opening mocked him (the rest of the so called 'Earth's Mightiest Heroes).

He actually had quickly to remind himself why. He wasn't enjoying being shackled and treated like a prisoner, either. _You're still hurt and outnumbered. Plus, SHIELD agents are never far._ He watched as her stance relaxed, showing that she was following his request. _I'll send you a way to bring me back, and then we'll get our revenge_. He then looked up at Thor, who was trying to get him to grip the container that the Tesseract was in so that they could go back to Asgard. With one final look in Phoenix's direction (to burn her image in his memory), he turned to Thor, gripping the container and soon they were gone from this realm.

Traveling by way of the Tesseract was a lot less enjoyable than even the bifrost. It had left him drained the last time that he had done it. If he had not had the scepter, he would have been at SHIELD's mercy when he arrived. When they landed in Asgard, he fell over, exhaustion taking over his form. He felt the hands of his brother wrap around his arms and lift him back up. People were nearby, taking the Tesseract. Loki kept his eyes on the ground, not sparing one of them a glance. He saw no need to look at any of them, even when he briefly heard Odin's voice speak to him.

He spared no words for any of them, and eventually, he was taken to the dungeon. Unlike the rest of Asgard, it was a dark and dank place, like most jails are, and he was happy to be in it. At least here, no one was staring at him and trying to talk to him, at least for now. They had removed the gag from his face as they locked him away, but the chains on his wrists had stayed.

He was glad that the gag had been removed. Now he could do the occasional spell. He could move his hands enough to do most things, at least the more minor spells. One of his minor spells was to be able to watch things from a great distance. Watching Phoenix was one of the few things that he could do to pass the time, and he wanted to know how she was doing. It hurt him to see how sad she was. He got to watch her as she walked away from New York, and occasionally got to see as she moved further south. He could only watch her when he was alone, which was sadly little.

Thor visited him every day. Loki came to dread hearing his thundering footfalls coming toward his cell. He had no idea why his brother continued to come. Loki tried to stay quiet during the visits, but, more often than not, they would devolve into shouting matches and Loki would scream at Thor until his throat was raw. Thor kept asking him why he had done everything, why he had tried to take over Midgard, and his questions would just eventually send Loki over the edge.

Frigga visited him several times, but not as often as Thor did. Her visits were almost tolerable. He did hate that he had hurt her. If she was the only family member that he had to deal with, he would be more likely to accept them back. She simply came and sat with him, sometimes talking, but once asking something that his brother never did. She asked about Phoenix.

She had been talking to him about things going on in the court, but he could see that there was something on her mind. She lapsed into silence for a few moments, before finally asking, "Why her?"

The question caught him off guard. "What?" It had been the first thing he had said during this visit. She seemed more content to just talk to him rather than need for him to say anything.

"The woman that you were with on Midgard," Frigga said. "You never showed more than a passing interest in any of the women here, but she caught your eye. Why her?"

He studied Frigga for a moment. "Because she believed in me," he told her. "She encouraged me." That wasn't all, though. He couldn't quite figure out just what all it was that connected him to her so readily. He could still feel her heat against his skin. He could still smell her scent. He couldn't believe that her belief in his cause was all that made him still want her. He just did not understand what it was.

Frigga did not appear to believe it, either. "You love her, son," she said to him. "You just smiled for the first time in the longest time when talking about her." He hadn't even realized that a smile had crossed his face, but she was right. He was still smiling at thinking of the lovely brunette who had somehow dug her way into his very soul. "I only wish that you had found her before all of this happened. Maybe our secrets would not have stung so much if you had someone to share the pain with."

He didn't answer, and watched as she stood up and left. A part of him raged against the idea that something so simple would have softened his anger toward Odin, the idea was ridiculous. Another part wondered if there was some truth to Frigga's words.

He'd never know if he continued to be stuck here. After Frigga was gone, he looked in on Phoenix again. He found her doing research this time, sitting at a table with what appeared to be a bottle of wine. He doubted that any books that she could find there would be of any help. He knew exactly what would help her, but he also knew that his old books disappearing would quickly be noticed. His non-father would likely be keeping track of any magical books that he had once owned, but all he could do was hope that any short time discomfort caused by that would be worth it. He searched the palace magically for the books, and, once he found them, did a simple teleportation spell about them. He knew that her magical abilities were still in their infancy, but he hoped that, with the right tools, she would be able to bring him back.

He watched her as she, in frustration, destroyed much of the room in which she dwelled. She was such an angry creature when things did not go her way. Then again, he could be as well. He continued to watch as she slumped to the ground, anger spent, and saw as she received the books that he had sent, and the small note that he had sent along.

_When you're done with your tantrum, I think these might be useful._

_Stay strong._

_L._

He let go of the vision of her just as she opened the book and smiled. He closed his eyes and leaned back against the walls of his cell. That little bit of magic had exhausted him. He understood that the shackles had prevented some of his magic, but now he suspected that the cell that he was in had some sort of magical dampening abilities as well. Those two spells should not have exhausted him so much.

OoOoOoOo

It had taken longer than he had expected for the disappearance of the books to be discovered. It was the next morning that Odin appeared outside of his cell, sending the guards into his cell to search for the books taken. Even so, he could tell by the look on Odin's face that he did not expect to find the books. Once his cell was searched, he was thrown back inside of it. Then Odin did something that he did not expect. He sent the guards away and stood outside of his cell.

"I am surprised that you have visited me at all," Loki said with an animalistic grin. "I haven't seen you since I was so welcomed back into Asgard."

Odin's face was a blank slate. "Do you have any idea what you've done?" he asked. "Where have you sent the books, Loki?"

Loki tilted his face at the Allfather. "I don't know what you're talking about," he said, still smiling at the older man. "I haven't seen any books since I have been brought here."

"I am sure that you didn't need to see them at all," Odin said, eyes narrowed at him. "I assume that you sent them to her." Odin took a step closer to the jail cell door. "You have no understanding of what she is, do you? You would stay far away from her if you did."

Loki rolled his eyes. "What are you so afraid of?" he asked, pushing himself further into the darkness of his cell. "She is just one person. What is it that brings the great Odin so much worry?"

"She would bring Ragnarok onto all of our heads!" Odin shouted. "That creature would bring about the end of the world!"

"What are you talking about?" Loki asked, glaring at him. There were some hints that she might be something more interesting than he initially suspected, but he truly had no clue as to what Odin was talking about.

"You truly do not know," Odin said, softer this time. "She is Surtur, the fire giant who would end the world."

That elicited a snort from Loki. "Really, I thought that you would come in with something better than bedtime stories," he said, ready to be done with this. "Surtur is a myth, a legend. If you want to frighten me away, you are going to have to do better than that."

"These are no lies, and she is no myth," Odin said, his voice staying in that now calm tone. "I am the one that sent her there, to Midgard. I wanted to prevent Ragnarok and that was the way I thought to do it." Odin looked down at the floor. "This was before you and Thor were born."

"You mean before I was _adopted_," Loki snarled. "Why am I not shocked by more secrets?" He stood up from where he was hiding, moving toward the cell door. "They call me the liesmith but all you have done my whole existence is _lie_!" She had once said to him that oblivion would be better than her existence, as she had no understanding of who she was or why she was how she was. It was a sentiment that he understood.

"I did what I thought was right!" Odin yelled at him.

"Oh, like I haven't heard that before!" Loki snapped right back. "The great Allfather, always doing what he thinks is right and yet seems to only make things worse. None of your plans ever go right! Why do you even still bother?"

"Sometimes I do not even know the answer to that myself," Odin said sadly.

As Odin walked away, guards came back into the cell. Loki wasn't surprised when they fitted him with the muzzle again. It was their best way of preventing him from using magic. He lost track of time. Frigga and Thor continued to visit, but now he couldn't respond back even if he wanted to. Odin stayed away, and for that, Loki was glad.

He wasn't sure how many days that he had been left like this when he felt magic pulling at him. He was relieved that Phoenix had figured out just exactly how to break him out of this miserable dungeon. The revenge that he had planned for the group of humans on Midgard would now include Odin as well. He would make sure of it. He could feel himself being pulled back to Midgard, and he could only laugh.


End file.
